March 2009 Archives

A former high school classmate of mine recently posted some photos on Facebook. Below is the one I was most surprised to see: it's yours truly and my friend Kelly at our Senior Prom.

In case you wondered, the answer is yes, that is a Miami Vice tuxedo I'm wearing. :P

Hollywood hasn't impressed me much this year, however there are two movies coming out that have me excited: the new Harry Potter movie in July and the long overdue, live-action version of one of my childhood favorites, Maurice Sendak's classic, Where The Wild Things Are.

This movie is being directed by Spike Jonz. For those of you who aren't familiar with the name, Jonz directed Being John Malkovich, the wonderfully dark and surreal movie which starred John Cusack as a puppeteer who discovers a portal into the brain of John Malkovich. Jonz also directed Adaptation, another brilliant, but more neurotic movie with Nicholas Cage, Meryl Streep, and Chris Cooper (who won an Oscar for Best Supporting Actor). I thoroughly enjoyed both of these films. One down side of Jonz was his involvement in MTV's Jackass movies, to which I readily acknowledge (and am proud) that I am not part of their target demographic. My hope is that Jonz did those for the money so he could continue making high caliber artsy films. Speaking of demographics, any movie of this classic Sendack work will automatically have a large family demographic. I read in interviews that, like me, Jonz read the book as a kid, and will want to share it with his own kids. Now given his track record with the dark, artsy films and hoping that he has the sense not to incorporate any elements from the Jackass series, I'm still a bit anxious about the final product. That said, another potential positive factor for this film is that the screenplay was written by Dave Eggers, the creative mind behind McSweeney's Internet Tendency. Eggers is co-founder of a program called 826 National, which promotes writing skills in kids ages 6-18 at seven centers across the U.S. Given that level of interaction with kids, I think there's very good reason to be hopeful that the script Jonz started with was in tune with younger audiences.

I just heard that the 80s classic movie Heathers is being made into a musical. I'm not much for musical theater, the last show we saw being Spamalot! a few years ago, but I have to say that if this show comes to Boston and is getting halfway decent reviews, then I'm going!

Here's some of my favorite lines from that movie that I hope make it into the lyrics (warning: adult language):

• "Grow up Heather, bulimia's so '87."
• "This is Ohio. If you don't have a brewski in your hand you might as well be wearing a dress."
• "Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast?"
• "I like it. It's got that what-a-cruel-world-let's-toss-ourselves-in-the-abyss type ambience."
• "Dear Diary, my teen-angst bullshit now has a body count."
• "Well, f*ck me gently with a chainsaw. Do I look like Mother Theresa?"
• "Tomorrow, I'll be kissing her aerobicized ass, but tonight, let me dream of a world without Heather, a world where I am free."

1. Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
2. Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
3. Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
4. Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
5. Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
6. That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
7. Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome'. That will bring on a 'whatever').
8. Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response, refer to # 3.

Thanks to my Aunt Mary for sharing this one.

The Wife Whisperer.

For the record, Melissa thought it was funny.

I found a link to this video on Francesco Marciuliano's site, Medium Large:

Melissa and I had the pleasure of babysitting our nephew Killian on Saturday. Here's a few photos we snapped during his visit:

Killian & Uncle Alan playing "Boxheads."